Poetry- weakness

to be outside myself
seeing me as you see me
am i weak to you
am i a toy
picked up manipulated
dropped at your convenience
do i matter to you now
did i matter then
u asked me for eternity
to give up my name
i said i would
a legal certificate of ownership
i would so willingly have signed
a whispered i love you
as you walked out my door
for the last time
if only id known id never feel your lips again
never smell your hair, your skin
never wake up safe in your arms
when did we become past tense
when did eternity end
i remember how it felt
when u put that ring on my finger
how it felt when i said yes
how it felt when u broke me
how it felt taking that ring
off
your i love you's still burn
your kisses indelibly etched on my skin
you wait for my weakest moments to return
a blazing reminder of what is lost
preying on my sympathy my affection
the lingering memories
of a love that almost broke me
to know that i burn you
the way you burn me
a sense of closure
eternally denied
how i begged
how u didnt care
how i waited
how u never came
when i needed you
always you deserted me
and yet
with a single hello
captivated
all hurt all fear all pain
eclipsed
just as easily
with a single word
my worth my humanity
in doubt
i lived and died
in the space between your words
this is a last farewell
final closure
taken by a ghost
created by but now free from
the wake of you
goodbye